The Motives and Manner of the Message (Ephesians 4:15)

Truth should mark our lives and lips as Christians. We are called to know the truth, be grounded upon the truth, and proclaim the truth. Yet, truth without love is not true truth, just as love without truth is not true love.

In Ephesians 4:15, Paul declares that truth is to find its permanent residence in love—and as Christians, our lives and lips must have an accuracy of both truth and love. In short, the motives and manner is just as important as the message.

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Key Passage: Ephesians 4:15

… but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, that is Christ …
– Ephesians 4:15

The Goal and Standard

• Ephesians 4:13, 15 – … until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the full knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ … we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, that is Christ …
• That is possible because Jesus …
  • Ephesians 4:11–12 – And He Himself gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ …
  • Equip the saints – to make ready for use … restore to usefulness … putting a thing into the condition in which it ought to be … to set a broken bone … to prepare fully
  • Edify the body of Christ – build up, strengthen, promote growth in the Christian life (from Gk idea to build a house)

Growth and maturity … SO THAT

• Ephesians 4:14 – … so that we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming …
  • back and forth, here and there
  • we are to be child-like, not childish
  • discernment
  • Infant/child is derived from a word that literally means “one not old enough to speak” … in contrast, because we are mature and are growing up in Christ, we are to speak truth in love. 
  • Ephesians 4:15–16– … but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, that is Christ, from whom the whole body, being joined and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the properly measured working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.
    • seems to be the remedy for immaturity and deception (speaking truth in love, growing up into Christ, connected with believers … so that each member participates … so the body grows and is built up in love).

Speaking the Truth in Love

• SPEAKING THE TRUTH (alētheuō) – be truthful, tell the truth, speak/preach truth, maintain the truth, cherish the truth, to “do” (live) the truth
  • verb (participle) – literally “truthing in love” 
  • 2x in NT (Galatians 4:16) … where the focus is on speaking/preaching the truth (Gospel)
  • NET Translator Notes – In classical times the verb could mean “to speak the truth,” or “to be true, to prove true.” In the LXX it appears [four] times (Gen 20:16; 42:16; Prov 21:3; Isa 44:26) and … is an ethical term used of proving or being true, not with the idea of speaking the truth. … [the] word speaks of being real or truthful in both conduct and speech. … In other words, the believers’ conduct should be transparent, revealing the real state of affairs, as opposed to hiding or suppressing the truth through cunning and deceit. ⁽¹⁾
• SPEAK truth … with both lips and life

The Demand of Truth

• The only way to cherish, hold onto, maintain, and speak the truth is that I first must know what the truth is. If I don’t know the standard, how can I judge the “winds of doctrine” in order to walk in the truth?
• John 8:31–32 – So Jesus was saying to those Jews who had believed Him, “If you abide in My word, then you are truly My disciples; and you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”
• John 14:6 – Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but through Me.”
• John 17:17– “Sanctify them by the truth; Your word is truth.”
• How well do I know the truth (in Person and Text)?
• The Ephesians heard the word of truth, the Gospel of their salvation (Eph 1:13)… Paul now presumes that they not only have received the truth (Gospel) but are also speaking and living it … because they are all ministers of the Gospel (4:12). But Paul exhorts them to bear a faithful witness of the accuracy of the Gospel, but He also addresses the motives and manner in which they are to convey that message.
• Ephesians 4:15– … but speaking the truth in love …
  • IN LOVE (en agapē) – affection, regard, love, cherish, generosity, benevolence; in a broad sense agapē seeks not its own benefit but the benefit of another, even at one’s own expense (true agapē is often inconvenient and costly)
  • en: a state of residence (not popping in and out of love, but remaining in a permanent position of love)
  • The Ephesians have come to know the love of Christ (3:19) … and that love is now to be demonstrated in their teaching (4:15), conduct (5:2), and unity (4:2)

3 Ideas (Truth in Love)

1. Truth is more than information

• We are to be a confessing church, whose message is marked by love. Thus truth is far more than mere intellectualism (knowing good information) … for it is truth lived (demonstrated in action) in love.
• Constantine R. Campbell – Truth alone will not keep the unity of the Spirit, since bad character has as much power to divide and destroy as false teaching does. ⁽²⁾
• John Stott – Thank God there are those in the contemporary church who are determined at all costs to defend and uphold God’s revealed truth. But sometimes they are conspicuously lacking in love. When they think they smell heresy, their nose begins to twitch, their muscles ripple, and the light of battle enters their eye. They seem to enjoy nothing more than a fight.” The truth of the gospel needs to be proclaimed and upheld within the community of believers. But it needs to be done with a heart that is tender and concerned about the feelings, growth, and well-being of fellow believers. ⁽³⁾
• In Matthew 18:15–20 (Jesus speaks about truth marked by love) … the love is assumed in the context of a shepherd going after lost sheep
• 2 Timothy 2:24–26– And the Lord’s slave must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may give them repentance leading to the full knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will.

2. Love is more than a hug

• Love puts someone’s interests and needs above your own. Which means if you see sin, error, or potential danger, love demands that you speak truth.
• Warren W. Wiersbe – Little children do not know how to blend truth and love. They think that if you love someone, you must shield him from the truth if knowing the truth will hurt him. It is a mark of maturity when we are able to share the truth with our fellow Christians, and do it in love. “Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful” (Prov. 27:6). … It has well been said that truth without love is brutality, but love without truth is hypocrisy. ⁽⁴⁾
• Love will confront

3. Is truth and love married in my life?

• Doctrinal vs Behavioral Heresy
  • It is not just correct doctrine (speaking TRUTH) but also the behavior or manner in which we speak that truth (LOVE) 
  • Illustration: the letter Q (is never used by itself but always accompanied by a vowel)
• John Phillips – We can go to two extremes. We can speak the truth but not in love, in which case we are being ungracious. Truth spoken in that spirit often offends and does little good because it alienates the people we are seeking to win. Or we can speak in love and suppress the truth, in which case we are being unfaithful. People who do not want to hurt someone’s feelings may say nothing and allow a sinful situation to continue. … True love, however, will always speak at the right time, with the right words, in the right spirit, and using the right approach. ⁽⁵⁾
• Does the truth in my life and the truth declared through my life and lips match the love of 1 Corinthians 13?
  • 1 Corinthians 13:4–7– Love is patient, love is kind, is not jealous, does not brag, is not puffed up; it does not act unbecomingly, does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered; it does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; it bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
    • Can I put my name in for “love”?
    • Can I say “When I speak, it is patient, kind, …”

Key Questions

• Am I known for truth?
• Am I immovable from the truth of Scripture?
• But am I also known for love?

FOOTNOTES

(1) Biblical Studies Press, The NET Bible, Second Edition (Denmark: Thomas Nelson, 2019).
(2) Constantine R. Campbell, The Letter to the Ephesians, ed. D. A. Carson, Pillar New Testament Commentary (Grand Rapids, MI: William B. Eerdmans Publishing Company, 2023), 186.
(3) John R. W. Stott, The Message of Ephesians: God’s New Society. Bible Speaks Today (Downers Grove, IL: IVP, 1979), 172.
(4) Warren W. Wiersbe, The Bible Exposition Commentary, vol. 2 (Wheaton, IL: Victor Books, 1996), 38.
(5) John Phillips, Exploring Ephesians & Philippians: An Expository Commentary, The John Phillips Commentary Series (Kregel Publications; WORDsearch Corp., 2009), Eph 4:15a.

Photo Credit: krakenimages

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In Our Next Study Together …

I invite you to join me on this journey from the book of Ephesians to discover God’s eternal purpose, His plan for your life, and learn how to practically live out an abundant and fruitful Christian life. 

• The focus of our next study: Ephesians 4:15–16
  • We are going to discuss the growth of the body of Christ.
  • I encourage you to read through Ephesians a couple of times this week and focus specifically on Ephesians 4.